Week 2: Fall 2015
How do you think about memory? What are your beliefs about memory lapses, aging? Do you feel powerless towards your memory? Many of us hold unrealistic expectations about memory what it is and how it works. We seek perfection from it. Our identity is built on our memories: from our favorite foods, our bank account numbers, to remembering what it is like to pet a horse, or be in love. Memory is all encompassing, it represents us in the world, encoded through our senses at the time.
Yet under the stress of memory lapses and fears of what it might mean, we tend to overlook the multi dimensions of memory. Take a trip down your lane of pleasant events, calling up memories of smells and sounds, touch and images. Does that experience make forgetting someone’s name seem less important? What would happen if you accepted your memory for all that it is? Next time you beat yourself up for forgetting someone’s name, smile to yourself and know that your memory is full of wonderful memories that have meant so much to you. Practicing your ability to remember special times in your life is a way to build a positive relationship to your way of thinking about yourself. This attitude is good for the memory as well, as adaptive beliefs open up the channels for better reception of information and the ability to recall information at a later date.
There are many things that affect our ability to remember and countless strategies to maintain or improve it. Two things tend to motivate people: fear and inspiration. Fear can get you going, but it doesn’t make you feel good and is not sustainable. Inspiration, on the other hand, motivates you to move forward, even when obstacles are placed in your way.
Memory Tips:
You may have already discovered ways to sidestep the anxiety of memory lapses with creative responses. For example: many of us have figured out that being honest with the person you are talking with that you can’t recall their name usually leads to “I know what you mean, that happens to me too”, with accompanying laughter.
Another tip: if you can’t remember what you were about to do, stop, go back a few steps, or back to where you first started and wait a few seconds and darn if it more often than not works. Accompanying this kind of approach is an inherent belief required that there is nothing wrong, that you just have to give your brain a chance to remember. Thanking your (brain, memory...) or yourself when you do remember seems to be a good reinforcement for this kind of approach.
Another idea is to: distract to remember, as we cannot feel two conflicting emotions at the same time. If you are feeling frustrated, caught in negative memories or responses, think of something that makes you laugh as humor goes a long way in enhancing memory function. By distracting your stress response you can gently refocus your attention onto what you were attempting to recall. Another approach is to think of a neutral memory (like the colour of your bedroom walls) allowing a defusing of the stressful emotion, defusing, backing out of that part of the brain associated to the anxiety. Recite the alphabet, count to twenty... what tricks work for you to return with a fresh outlook to what you were trying to remember?
Content compiled and excerpted from ‘The Memory Workbook’ by Douglas J. Mason, Psy.D and Michael L. Kohn, Psy.D. Published by New Harbinger Publications Inc. Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books.
How do you think about memory? What are your beliefs about memory lapses, aging? Do you feel powerless towards your memory? Many of us hold unrealistic expectations about memory what it is and how it works. We seek perfection from it. Our identity is built on our memories: from our favorite foods, our bank account numbers, to remembering what it is like to pet a horse, or be in love. Memory is all encompassing, it represents us in the world, encoded through our senses at the time.
Yet under the stress of memory lapses and fears of what it might mean, we tend to overlook the multi dimensions of memory. Take a trip down your lane of pleasant events, calling up memories of smells and sounds, touch and images. Does that experience make forgetting someone’s name seem less important? What would happen if you accepted your memory for all that it is? Next time you beat yourself up for forgetting someone’s name, smile to yourself and know that your memory is full of wonderful memories that have meant so much to you. Practicing your ability to remember special times in your life is a way to build a positive relationship to your way of thinking about yourself. This attitude is good for the memory as well, as adaptive beliefs open up the channels for better reception of information and the ability to recall information at a later date.
There are many things that affect our ability to remember and countless strategies to maintain or improve it. Two things tend to motivate people: fear and inspiration. Fear can get you going, but it doesn’t make you feel good and is not sustainable. Inspiration, on the other hand, motivates you to move forward, even when obstacles are placed in your way.
Memory Tips:
You may have already discovered ways to sidestep the anxiety of memory lapses with creative responses. For example: many of us have figured out that being honest with the person you are talking with that you can’t recall their name usually leads to “I know what you mean, that happens to me too”, with accompanying laughter.
Another tip: if you can’t remember what you were about to do, stop, go back a few steps, or back to where you first started and wait a few seconds and darn if it more often than not works. Accompanying this kind of approach is an inherent belief required that there is nothing wrong, that you just have to give your brain a chance to remember. Thanking your (brain, memory...) or yourself when you do remember seems to be a good reinforcement for this kind of approach.
Another idea is to: distract to remember, as we cannot feel two conflicting emotions at the same time. If you are feeling frustrated, caught in negative memories or responses, think of something that makes you laugh as humor goes a long way in enhancing memory function. By distracting your stress response you can gently refocus your attention onto what you were attempting to recall. Another approach is to think of a neutral memory (like the colour of your bedroom walls) allowing a defusing of the stressful emotion, defusing, backing out of that part of the brain associated to the anxiety. Recite the alphabet, count to twenty... what tricks work for you to return with a fresh outlook to what you were trying to remember?
Content compiled and excerpted from ‘The Memory Workbook’ by Douglas J. Mason, Psy.D and Michael L. Kohn, Psy.D. Published by New Harbinger Publications Inc. Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books.
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